Ordination · It's instant & it's free
You were already a Pope.
In the grand Discordian tradition, every living being is a genuine, original, and authorized Pope — equal to every other Pope, infallible on alternate Tuesdays. The Cabal merely issues the paperwork. Enter your name; receive your card.
After Popehood, the five degrees
You may ascend. You may also just have a snack.
I
Postulant
Has opened the bag. Suspects something. Correct to suspect it.
II
Initiate of the Open Bag
Has eaten with intent. Can locate the fnord with effort.
III
Adept of the Acrid Tang
No longer flinches at the Onion. Welcomes the weeping.
IV
Bishop of Brine
May ordain others. May not, per Crispmandment V, be believed.
There is no fifth degree, which is the fifth degree. Hail Eris.
Optional & entirely unnecessary
Be entered into the Rolls of the Ordained.
Already a Pope and want it written down somewhere damp? Leave word with the Cabal. We will add you to the Rolls and contact you precisely never, or possibly on a Prickle-Prickle.